Every culture has ideas it mistakes for truth. I believe one of ours is resilience.
We’ve normalized adaptations that helped us survive and
mistaken them for personality, strength, success, and resilience.
We've confused resilience with endurance.
Celebrated self-sacrifice as strength.
Praised people for making it work while quietly disconnecting from themselves.
My work explores what happens when we redefine resilience—not as becoming harder to break, but as becoming more deeply rooted in who we are so we can live freely and share our unique perspective with the world.
The Conversation
What if the most meaningful change doesn't begin with better habits — it begins with better questions? Questions like...
What if burnout isn't the problem?
What if perfectionism isn't your personality?
What if resilience has been misunderstood?
What if many of the strengths we admire are actually worn out survival patterns that outlived the circumstances that created them?
Through essays, reflections, and research, I explore the hidden ways outdated patterns shape our lives—and what becomes possible when we begin living from conscious choice instead.
These aren't articles about becoming a new version of yourself.
They're invitations to remember the version of your that learned to hide in order to belong, achieve, succeed, or be loved — to give yourself permission to have what you want without having ot work so damn hard to earn it.
How To Look To The Future With Hope After Loss…
How To Look To The Future With Hope After Loss…
…even if you’re scared of getting stuck in feelings of sadness.
My journey to becoming a mother was a bumpy one. Having come through to the other side, I can now see clearly many of the “silver linings”, lessons that I carry with me to this day, which came from those dark times.
Note: This is not a “everything happens for a reason” post. I know that’s not helpful. I’m interested in sharing what DOES make a difference on the road to healing after pregnancy loss.
The fact is, it’s nearly impossible to heal when something hurts so badly that each time we think about it we have to push it away, shove it down, save it for later or else risk losing control.
The bad news
There are no two ways about it: When we push something under the rug, it leaves a lump. And each time we tread there, we are left with the choice of going out of our way to circumvent it OR to stay the course and trip over it each time. What’s not allowed will remain; as the saying goes “what we resist, persists.”
When it comes to losing a baby, that lump in the rug is pretty big: thoughts of what went wrong, what might have been, what it means for the future…the grief, sadness, anger and resentment can be extremely overwhelming and the fact is most of us are not prepared nor equipped to handle it.
Add to it the roller coaster of lingering pregnancy hormones flooding your body, combined with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline (triggered by your body’s natural “fight or flight” response), and it’s no wonder you feel like a mess.
The good news
Allowing the unwelcome feelings at a time you choose can be extremely empowering, and we have a resource that walks you through how. It’s a free guided meditation.
By simply giving yourself the time and space to honor how you feel, you can allow your feelings to come to the surface without getting stuck in them, offer yourself some much-needed and -deserved compassion and relief, and in time, truly heal.
KindNest offers a range of options for supporting yourself in allowing the unwelcome emotions, so you may take steps in the direction of healing and looking to the future with hope, ranging from a Healing Essentials digital course to one-on-one coaching.